About Bullies

Studies have shown that bullies are made by their environments rather than biology. Bullying is not a negative behavioral pattern a person is born with, therefore it is possible to control impulses to negatively exert power over others and this is best done at a very early age where the initial signs can be detected by those living in close proximity to the child. The toddler age in a child’s life is the starting point of asserting their will and if this is left uncorrected, it will eventually cause the child to evolve into a bully.


 A good percentage of bullies eventually grow into fairly normal adults yet they are still very much capable of being overly assertive when the occasion calls for such a display. However there are the few who tend to take things too far and even as adults are unable to act and rationalize things in a civil manner thus becoming a nuisance and a threat to society at large.


More often than not children who are the victims of bullying will almost always keep this fact to themselves for fear of repercussions if they tell on the bully. Children do not see bullying ending well for themselves in many scenarios, and fear is a driving force that can incite them to keep their pain to themselves rather than face it head on. This is not an ideal scenario as detection is difficult from uninvolved parties if there are no witnesses or victims who are willing to step up and speak of the traumatizing experiences. However, parents should take the initiative to explain to their children how destructive this behavior can be and encourage them to open up about their experience to trusted friends and advisors. This positive reinforcement is a good way to get children to come clean about their own bullying experiences, which is the first step to solving them. 


Teaching a child to resolve matters without resorting to bullying is extremely important and can actually be started from a very early age. Children should be instructed to settle disputes in respectful ways, treating each other’s feelings and personal space as utterly meaningful. Starting these lessons in a calm and gentle manner would be wise, as the child will eventually follow the parent’s lead in the way matters are handled. However there may be times where a more severe action needs to be taken in order to teach the child that the bullying tactic is unacceptable, and this should be done firmly but without unnecessary force.

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